genderkoolaid

bucksboobs

Yes we need more chaste twee baby gay romances like heartstopper and yes we also need more shows where men fuck raw to express their love for one another like Élite and yes we need more toxic gays having hate sex like Interview with the Vampire and yes we need more incidental gay characters like the dads in cartoons like Owl House.

It's not a competition! It's a hoard and I'm like a gay little Smaug.

cir-c

the normalization of porn in mainstream media is a weird take to have

bucksboobs

Normalization of gay desire and yes, even gay sex, is paramount to gay liberation actually.

liizardlegs

cringesunday

the worst thing in the world is doing things. the second worst thing in the world is not doing things. how has no one ever come up with a solution for this

nothorses

triviallytrue

just an fyi for people who've let their social skills atrophy by spending too much time on tumblr:

this is generally not a good thing to say to a stranger on a nonsexual post

pyroxeene

Tags of people who hit the nail on the head better than I ever could

spacelazarwolf

butch4butches

Butch4Butch Erotica

Against the Ropes - Tensions run high in the boxing ring between rivals.

Amateurs - Some butch friends film amateur porn in a parking lot, and get caught.

Bittersweet Rivals - Two basketball rivals meet at the bar and work out their rivalry on the dancefloor.

BOY TOY - A couple explores a "BOY TOY" collar fantasy together, and acts it out in the bedroom.

Butch Bros - Two butch buds hang out and have a good time on the couch.

Butch Cocksuckers - A set of roommates work on their communication together.

Camping Trip - Charlie and her friends go on a camping trip together after the Halloween party.

Forgive Me, Father - A naughty boy gets punished at the altar of a Catholic church.

Gym Rat - A gym bro follows a silver fox to the showers.

Halloween Party - Charlie and the gang throw a Halloween party and play truth or dare.

Library Stacks - Two students find a creative way to study in the library, and they get caught.

New Year's - Charlie and her friends go to a kink party for New Year's Eve.

Oil Change - Jack's friend needs some help in the garage.

Poker Game - Charlie and her friends play poker and find a new way to place their bets.

Road Trip - A country boy and a city boy take a road trip together, and the city boy misbehaves.

Sexting - Sir is away for the week, and plays with his kitten.

Smoke and Flame - Two friends shotgun the last of their weed and get carried away.

Suit and Tie - Two butches get dressed up for the opera and don't make it out the door.

Tough Guy - A heartbroken butch goes to the bar, flagging black on the right.

Use Me - A drink on the couch becomes more when the boy learns how to ask for what he wants.

nothorses

ohevoyev

i wanna see a hannibal-level psychosexual obsession between two normal people. like some freak who works at a deli counter and the city bus driver who buys sandwiches with anchovies on purpose

sabitsukis

chismosavirus

spacelazarwolf

Anonymous asked:

Do you realize the idea of inherent AFAB oppression implies inherent AMAB privilege, the idea of which is so fucking transmisogynist

spacelazarwolf answered:

actually the idea that inherent afab oppression implies inherent amab privilege is bullshit and only further enforces a ra/di/cal feminst view of the gender and sex binary that i thought we agreed sucked, but y'all seem to hold it as gospel. i’m jewish tho so i’m not interested.

spoekelse

this is what false dichotomies and rigid binaries do to a mfer

spacelazarwolf

computer-powered-waffles

a distinction that has made a world of difference for me is that patriarchy is ruled not by “men”, but patriarchs. the inherent AFAB oppression mentioned comes not from one group always being treated better, but the only unoppressed group requiring something between your legs to get into the club. “getting in the club” also requires a strict behavioral code which every queer identity is excluded from.

spacelazarwolf

^^^^^^ this

the same ppl and frameworks maintaining the systemic oppression of ppl who were assigned female at birth via legislating our bodies, neglecting our medical needs, paying us less, etc. are the same ones maintaining the systemic oppression of queer and trans ppl.

aatroxskitten

also worth noting that cis women, esp cishet white women, hold more systemic power to uphold sex-based oppression than trans women do anyway and any discussion of afab sexism will acknowledge that cis women are often at the forefront of keeping everyone else in the crab bucket.

spacelazarwolf

^^^^^^^^

i’ve encountered a few individual trans women with not so great opinions on things like abortion and birth control, but the most they can do to me is just be an asshole to me on the internet or vote for shitty bills and politicians. there are, however, thousands of cis women actively lobbying and holding high positions of power in my country who are trying to (and succeeding at) legally remove those rights. trans women as a class, and i would argue the vast majority of them individually, do not have the systemic power to oppress people who were assigned female at birth on the basis of sex. as with most oppressed people, we have the ability to perpetuate bigotry and contribute to systemic oppression, but it is exceedingly rare for us to be in positions of power that actually control that systemic oppression.

spacelazarwolf

Anonymous asked:

Is it cringe to be into trans men but not cis men? I’m a transfem and I don’t know if this is fetishistic but I’m just always feeling unsafe around cis men in a way trans men never made me feel. I feel guilty about it and don’t know how to explain it outside of that.

spacelazarwolf answered:

nah i think it’s valid. there are gonna be some ppl who will be weird abt it bc they’re obsessed with insisting that trans men are indistinguishable from cis men but that’s just simply not true. we’re different from cis men, so dating us will be a different experience, and that’s okay. it’s okay to want that different experience, especially as a fellow trans person. as long as you just treat them like a human being and don’t make weird comments about their genitals, which i’m sure won’t be a problem, then you’re all good. live ur t4t dreams.

spacelazarwolf

and like. i kinda have weird feelings abt fetishization bc like ok.

i hooked up with a queer person who used all the right language and did all the right things, but then they told me they only date ppl who were afab, regardless of gender. they’ll fuck ppl who were amab but they won’t date them, only afab ppl. the further we got into the convo, it became clear that the reason they only wanted to date ppl who were afab is bc we are more likely to have been socialized to take on the brunt of the domestic and emotional labor in relationships. that hookup ended up lasting over an hour bc they kept interrupting sex to complain about their ex wife. by the end i was practically shoving them out the door because i was so uncomfortable.

the guy i’m hooking up with right now is very cis and found me through the ftm tag on grindr, so he was specifically looking for trans guys. he told me he’s into trans guys because he likes sleeping with masculine people, mostly men, but he also likes the way vaginas feel. could that be seen as fetishistic? sure. does it feel that way to me when we have sex? nope. he uses gender affirming language without even being asked, he tells me he’s super into my body and gets excited when he notices that i’ve grown more hair or had a t dick growth spurt. he likes my body because it’s trans, and i’m perfectly okay with that.

i felt so much more fetishized by the queer person who was actively seeking out afab ppl to take advantage of essentially patriarchal trauma than i ever have by the guy who just likes trans pussy. so i feel like we just really need to have a conversation about what it actually means to fetishize someone because it very much feels like it’s just become “thinks trans ppl are hot” and i hate that literally other trans ppl are scared of finding other trans ppl hot for fear of fetishizing. trans ppl are fucking hot! our trans bodies are hot! it’s okay to be sexually attracted to trans bodies!

hazel2468

THIS. This this this, a thousand times this.

I personally think that a lot of people have decided that "being attractive to something non-normative" = "fetishizing" which... Is just blatantly not true. But it's how you end up with people who think that someone who is explicitly (and perhaps only) attracted to trans/genderqueer bodies is an evil fetishizer instead of, you know. Someone who likes that kind of body. Same vein of thinking as people who think that those who are attracted to fat people are all chubby chasers with a fat/feeding fetish instead of just people who find fat bodies attractive.

Like imo? There is no fucking difference between saying "Oh yeah, I really like guy pussy" and "I really like big dick and muscles." It's just what you like, and I hate that when someone expresses that they like something that is seen as "not normal"- not a straight, cis, white, abled, thin body, people act like it's a fetish or it's objectifying. Because what that says, at least to me as a fat genderqueer transmasc, is that being attracted to me as I am is inherently not normal and not good. And that is a fucking SHITTY message to send.

The problem with trans chasers and chubby chasers and "fetishizers" (and honestly, people really need to like, read up on what a fetish is because I'm sick of seeing it used as some bad thing all the time, it's not) is that they treat people as not whole people. Whether, as in the example above, they take advantage of actual or perceived trauma and behavior associated with one's assigned gender, or as a personal example, they're only interested in sleeping with you because they've "never fucked a fat chick and hear that you girls give awesome head". People who do that shit see the people they go after as experiences or novelties, or as something exotic. A sex object that they can use.

Whereas someone who is just into trans bodies, fat bodies... They just like those bodies. And they will treat you as a whole person. You're not a sexual toy to them- you're a person that they think is hot, that they want to sleep with. They care about you and your body and what you need. Again, it's no different than someone who dates people with brown eyes or cool dyed hair because they find those things attractive. It's just "this is what I look for physically in a partner".

teratocybernetics

'#i genuinely really like this post #because it is always difficult for me to acknowledge that i do have preferences due to this sort of thing #are they strong ones? no. but just the fact that they exist doesn't meant that i'm fetishizing something!!#however my brain and american purity culture are both mean' will smith gesturing meme goes here

ad-luc3m

I am aspec. If I got attracted to a transmasc person, I would be attracted to them for the *person* they are. I would probably never get into their pants enough to *care* what their genitals look like lol.

spacelazarwolf

ok? congrats?